“why are you talking so fast?”
” can you stop talking like that”
“what’s wrong with you, why are you talking so fast?”
” you need to stop.”
Oh I’m sorry that because you are listening too slow, you feel the need to criticize my talking.
I don’t know why I talk fast but I have since I was a teenager. My brain just wants to spit out the words in a rapid succession and I just talk really fast; leading people to look at me weird because:
a)I’m obviously talking to fast and
b)they may not be able to keep up.
I really try to slow down and tell myself that you need to breathe and slow the fuck down. But does it work, nope. It gets worse when my mood is good, for instance, being excited about going on vacation. This past week I’ve been on a high( not only from the pot) and I’ve heard every single one of those sentences. And every time I was told something like that I wanted to die.
Seriously? You really think I like talking like this? Do you really fucking think that you telling me to calm down or question me will help me? No, I already have a million in 2 things I hate about myself and then you go and say shit like that. People wonder why I barely talk.
School presentations , a nightmare. “Can you try not to talk so fast?” Yeah I can try, will it happen , no. Trust me, I’ve tried. I can even “calm” myself down as much as possible and yet still as soon as I’m up there in front of the class, a 100 words per minute. And of course everyone has to criticize it like I don’t already know or somehow their words will spark an epiphany in me and I’ll be cured.
The boyfriend thought it would be good to say those things to me; every time they were said I just went silent, I was done talking- not worth my time. I told him to fuck off and that he shouldn’t have said that to me when I was only being excited and wanted to talk to him.
Then I come home and within the first fucking day my mother has to get on my shit. I had just finished talking about whatever and then she goes ” oh jesus you talk so fast-doesn’t she talk so fast?” uhm thanks I appreciate that. Did you even fucking listen to what I said or are people too concerned about the pace of my speech.
I am sick and tired of people judging how fast I talk-fuck off, seriously. I don’t go around telling you how the fuck to talk . You are not helping, anything.
If you don’t want me to talk then that’s how you do it.
Which apparently in the last week, (which btw has been the most talking I’ve done in a while) is how it wants to be done.
I’m done. Minimal words and head shakes.