Long fucking day

Had minimal sleep last night ( thank you spawn and bladder) and then woke up to the bf making noise at 6..tried to go back to sleep (which just involved me tossing and turning) then the cat attacking the fucking door to come in( bf was smoking in the bathroom with his headset on soo didn’t hear her) had to get up and let her in ..kinda wanted to punch them both in the face.

Went back to bed..correction laid back in bed attempting this sleep thing again only to hear the bf making more noise that he can’t hear because of his fucking headset.. finally just ended up getting up and grilling the hell out of him while he asks “why are you upset”..uhm because its 7 and i just want to sleep dipshit.

Not a happy camper right now because I’m tired..bored and its going to take forever until nighttime and I could actually go to bed lol.

Plus I think his mother put the heat on again.. by mistake  of course which only makes the house 1000 fucking degrees and she wonders why it’s soo hot.. ugh. Twice this week I have found the heat on and i want to rip the thing off the wall!

I guess I can get dressed and go out for a little and hope I don’t fall asleep somewhere šŸ˜Š

-Jas

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bitter

I see the way

you stare at her,

affectionate and loving,

with your stupid fucking

soft tone asking about

her needs, making

her comfortable, you

do realize a cat gets treated

better than me…

-JasĀ©


Note: I’m a hater , the bf has been home lately (hurt from work) and they are both

getting on my nerves ..Ā seriously Ā fuck them both lol

The Sneaky Cat

Like I’ve stated before my cat despised the new door. Hated it. Hated us. Hated life.

She was not a happy camper.

Until she realized “wait I’m  a cat, they have to do what I say.” Seriously, when did cats realize they were  the masters instead? Egyptian  times?

Anyway, meowing frantically behind a door and persistent scratching gets your owners, I mean slaves to move faster.

Once they are fully conditioned to open doors, get them to stand around by the door waiting on you furr and paws. Making sure  you have the open permission to come and go as you please.

The door must be open at a 43 degree angle, allowing for optimal space to run through.

When meowing, the door must be open within the first minute or I’ll make noises resembling murder.

You will obey what I say or suffer the wrath of satan. And by that I mean luring you into my sad kitty eyes and fluffy belly, only to sink my claws into your flesh.

What. A. Bitch.

The first 100 times I did  it,until I realized I became  my cats submissive and that was intolerable. There was no way I was going to keep getting up and standing around waiting for her. Nope F’n way.

So I stopped.

She cried and scratched but I wasn’t giving in, I was standing my ground (plus im tired of being atracked).

She stayed upstairs for 2 days.

Until one night I heard the meowing. Oh God automatically popped into my head with a heavy sigh. Nope too tired and lazy to get up,she would just have to turn back around and go back upstairs.

I heard her scratch a little then the sound of her paw going under something and the door open.

Well that settles things, the cats finally doing something smart.

Told the boyfriend the next day about the exciting news, I wouldn’t have to get up anymore!

Of course he thought I was crazy;

BF:You’re kidding rightt

Me:Dudeee I swear she opened the door, I didnt see it but I heard it!

Bf: Idk about that,I’m  not believing it.

Well a couple of days later when hes on the couch what happens.. ohh idk the cat opens the fucking door! Ha, he believed me then.

He didnt see it fully either, but one minute the doors closed, you hear cat and then the doors open.

I don’t care how she does it but she better keep it up.

-J.Rose

Snowy Saturday and Birthday Cake

Well its cold and snowy here today,which surprisingly I dont mind. I actually love the snow and was beginning to wonder where the hell it was.

Today is also my boyfriends birthday. The big 26. Do people say that? Lol they should. 26 is such an awkward number,technically it shouldn’t even matter. There are the big birthdays we can look forward to but 26…meh.

I wrote a couple of days ago about my gifts…things didnt work out as planned.

I was able to make him coupons,26 plus 1 for good luck that turned into 3 for good luck haha, what a lucky man!

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You can see that they range from breakfast making to some sexual favors.

“Oh, i see you put all the good ones at the bottom”, he said coyly.

“Well,I was hoping that you would get tired of looking through them and give up,never having to look at them again.” I laughed.

“Soo,do i like have to tell you in advance or can it be the same day” while he split the cards up,by importance,of course.

” Theres an expiration date bitch so dont get to carried away”

Ah yes, I saw the wheels turning in his head, the smirk,almost maniacally as he meticulously studied the coupons.

What the fuck did I get myself into?

Confession: I’mĀ  a little excited for some of them.

I told him about the scavenger hunt that was no longer, but he was completely unfazed. Why would he be, when he has f’n coupons.

The contractor for the new door came at 9 A.M (not happy.at.all.). We literally had a curtain in place for a door.

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And now..

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A DOOR! Our very own door, with a lock and key! We had that stupid curtain for,oh, I dont know 3 months. Ugh,can’t say I’ll miss it.

Unfortunately, during this process, the contractor, his wife and the mother in law were down here in my way. I dont like people in my space or interruptingĀ  my me time.Ā  But i understood,I made the sacrifice(Hid in my room),but still.

It took longer than I anticipated. Well between smoke breaks and gossip they were finally gone by 12 30. Then I had to rush to cut,bread and freeze mozzarella for mozzarellaĀ  sticks. Then wash dishes and put them away (I usually just like to wash, the hubby can put them away). Cut and prepare the ingredientsĀ  for pepper steak. Make and decorate cake.

And during this process, while my anxiety is high as shit, our cat, who DOES NOT like the new door, keeps meowing to go in and out,in and fucking out. Then she wants some loving,fine everyone needs loving.

A nice moment turned to shit when her fucking talons got stuck on my sock;a mexican standoff took place,literally one wrong move and you’re done.

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ButĀ  unlike the cat who has nothing to do I had
to get out of there, so despite the menacing glare and the low beginnings of a hiss i slipped out of my sock. I should have just left it,lost forever to the devil, there are better socks somewhere. But nooo J couldn’t leave the sock behind, its mine. So foolishly and confidently I went in to take back what was mine.

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Uhm, I got my sock back though. Was it worth it? Definitely fucking not! Does my hand hurt? Hell fuckings yes.

I hate you cat. I dont really mean it but at the moment i do since you are beingĀ  needy and mean because you dont like the new door. Well stick it cat!

The cake and cupcakes came out good as did the pepper steak. It wasnt till we were done eating that we both remember that mozzarella sticks are in the freezer. Not a surprise.. it wouldn’t be a dinner made by me if i didnt forget something.

All in all it was a good dinner or like the boyfriend likes to say a late lunch.

I only had to open the door for like cat 143 times and deal with her grilling me.

Now, we can relax (minus the cat,we’re not on speaking terms),maybe use some coupons and have a relaxing Saturday.

Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!

-J.Rose

P.S heres a picture of the cake .. lets just say i like things different.
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Lazy weekend

As I lay here smoking and listening to the boyfriend snore I realized for the who knows number weekend in a row I did absolutely nothing.

Actually I may have done some school work last weekend but still.

This semester is a bitch for me.

Technically, I “graduated” two years ago but due to financial situations and adding a minor,OH and taking off a semester I’m stuck in college till April.

Now back to the lazy weekend.

Nothing.

No cleaning, laundry,homework.

I did cook and managed to drag myself into the shower.WIN.

Other than that me, the couch and the meatbag (cat) had an awesome time binge watching Hemlock Grove.

I had ice cream  for dinner and breakfast sometime during the weekend. I advise,despite the delicousness, to NOT do that. It was sooo good, until my body demanded actual nutrients. Stupid body.

I neglected school work. I figured I’m failing 2 out of the 3 fucking classes im taking. So whats the point. I’m  retaking them next semester anyways.

Hope everyone else had a better weekend!

-J.Rose

The Tale of the fat cat

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There once was a cat named Sophie who loved nothing but to chase the birds, eat delicous Tilapia,and to sleep on her favorite chair.

As the years went on and she got older, the once adventerous cat spent more and more time eating and sleeping.

She rarely wanted to go out, for fear of other cats or lack of enjoyment we will never know. She laid around all day, only waking to feast before lazing around again.

Then one day, Sophie’s back hair was noticeably different,matted in a certain spot.  She didn’t seen to mind and went about her normal routine.

But it got bigger and bigger.

Her owners couldn’t have that. She couldn’t  be petted. So something needed to be done.

Off Sophie went to the doctor.

We were then informed  Sophie the cat was too fat to clean herself properly. She had eaten herself to the point of not being able to bend around and lick her back.

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They shaved her back and put her on a diet, that she seems to be tolerating better than expected.

Anddd thats the story how we found out our perfect cat was technically obese.
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On the topic of cats :

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We have some stray cats living in our backyarc since the summer. I think we need to get rid of them despite me letting them in and playing with them lol. Plus our cat HATES them. The boyfriend on the otherhand wants to keep them even though the city was called on us. We’ll see what happens.

-J.Rose